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Connoisseur of ‘Where’s Wally’ claims to have figured out the 7 Wonders of the World.
‘’I don’t know, I think that I understand them. Not a lot of people get what they’re actually about. They’re no wonder to me,’’ said Liam O’ Flatherta in his local pub in Castlebar earlier today. When he was quizzed about what exactly he understood about the wonders, Flatherta gazed into the distance, a little smirk on his face and winked. After an uncomfortable amount of silent eye contact, Flatherta whispered,
“That’s for me to find and you to know about.” He then burst into what can be vaguely interpreted as ‘knowing’ laughter, took a large gulp of Smithwicks, and added, “As they say.”
The self-proclaimed ‘celebrity of these parts’ gained regional fame in a county-wide ‘Where’s Wally’ competition earlier in the month. Flatherta found Wally in eighty different crowds in under an hour. When asked would he be defending his title this month, he bowed his head, appeared to be holding back tears and continued,
“That wouldn’t be fair at all. I need to give the young lads a chance. I have had my day in the sun. It’s time for this lion to hang up his mittens and let the cubs come out to feast on the vulture. Anyway, it would be like putting an award-winning marathon runner like Sonia O’ Sullivan against a beginner runner like Rob Heffernan…I know the game. I am the game. Some people look for Wally but I inherently know where he is. I guess I’m kind of like the eight wonder of the world.”
When asked what his next challenge would be, having retired from professional Wally spotting, he procured a photo of the Great Pyramid of Giza and seemed to shout and whisper simultaneously,
“Home. I’m going home” Catch up with you tomorrow!